Church Discipline: When Love Refuses to Look the Other Way

Few subjects are more uncomfortable for Christians to discuss than church discipline. In a culture that tells us to mind our own business, avoid uncomfortable conversations, and never judge anyone else, the biblical command to confront unrepentant sin can seem harsh—even unloving. But 1 Corinthians 5 gives us a very different picture.

Paul is writing to a deeply troubled church in Corinth. They had divisions, sexual immorality, lawsuits between believers, confusion about Christian liberty, and numerous other problems. Yet Paul does not abandon them. Instead, he continues to give them gospel answers. In chapter 5, Paul addresses a particularly serious situation: a man in the church was engaged in a sexual relationship with his father's wife. The sin was so serious that even the pagan culture surrounding Corinth recognized it as unacceptable. But Paul's greatest concern wasn't simply the man's sin. It was the church's response to his sin.

When the Church Becomes More Tolerant of Sin Than the World

Paul says, "It is actually reported that there is sexual immorality among you, and of a kind that is not tolerated even among pagans" (1 Corinthians 5:1). The Corinthian church knew what this man was doing. They knew it was wrong. And yet they were apparently tolerating it. Paul's response is striking: "And you are arrogant! Ought you not rather to mourn?"

Why would Paul call them arrogant? Because they had developed such a low view of sin that they could watch someone publicly live in rebellion against God and simply look the other way. Perhaps they thought, We're under grace. Jesus has forgiven us. Who are we to judge? But biblical grace never gives us permission to continue happily in sin.

We are saved by grace, not by our works. We do not earn salvation by keeping God's law. But grace changes us. A genuine believer may fall into terrible sin, but a genuine believer cannot remain comfortable in unrepentant sin. The evidence of saving faith is not sinlessness. It is repentance. A Christian is not someone who never sins; a Christian is someone who, when confronted with sin, runs back to Christ.

Church Discipline Isn't About Punishment

Paul's command is startling: "Let him who has done this be removed from among you." This is the biblical foundation for what we call church discipline.

Church discipline is not the church taking revenge on someone who has sinned. It isn't about humiliating people, making examples of them, or taking a victory lap because we've caught someone doing something wrong. If that were the standard, none of us would remain. Church discipline is necessary when someone who professes to follow Christ is living in persistent, public, unrepentant sin and refuses to turn from it.

There is an important distinction here: church discipline isn't for someone who sins; it is for someone who refuses to repent of their sin. Every Christian sins. Every Christian needs grace. Every Christian needs correction. But when someone continually embraces sin, refuses correction, and insists that they belong to Christ while showing no evidence of repentance, the church has a responsibility to lovingly confront that person. Why? Because their soul matters.

The Most Loving Thing a Church Can Do

Paul tells the Corinthians to "deliver this man to Satan... so that his spirit may be saved in the day of the Lord." That sounds incredibly severe, but notice the purpose: "so that his spirit may be saved." The goal is restoration.

Church discipline is ultimately an act of love because it is intended to wake someone up to the seriousness of their spiritual condition. Imagine telling someone they are safely walking toward heaven when their life gives every indication that they are walking away from Christ. That isn't love. Love tells the truth.

Jesus gave the church this responsibility in Matthew 18. He instructed believers to first confront a brother privately. If he refuses to listen, take one or two others. If he still refuses to repent, the matter is brought before the church. And if he refuses even the church's correction, Jesus says to treat him as a Gentile and a tax collector. Paul isn't inventing a new practice in Corinth. He is applying the instructions of Jesus. The goal isn't to destroy the person. The goal is to call the person to repentance.

Church Membership and Church Discipline

There is an important connection between church membership and discipline. When someone joins a local church, they are professing to be a Christian. The church, in turn, affirms that profession. The church welcomes them, encourages them, shepherds them, and recognizes them as a brother or sister in Christ.

Church discipline says something very different. It says, We can no longer affirm your profession because your persistent, unrepentant life contradicts it. That doesn't necessarily mean the person is definitively unsaved. Only God knows the heart. But the church is responsible to respond to what a person's life is demonstrating.

If someone eventually repents, the church should rejoice and restore them. That is the goal. Repentance restores fellowship.

Discipline Should Produce Grief, Not Pride

Paul tells the Corinthians that they should mourn. That matters. If we confront someone's sin with pride, arrogance, or a sense of superiority, we have completely missed the heart of church discipline.

We are sinners confronting sinners. The difference is not that we are better than the person being disciplined. The difference is that we are calling one another to repentance because Christ has commanded us to pursue holiness.

Galatians 6:1 says that if someone is caught in transgression, those who are spiritual should restore that person "in a spirit of gentleness," while keeping watch on themselves so that they aren't tempted. There should be tears before there is discipline, prayer before confrontation, and humility throughout the process. And there should always be a desire for restoration.

A Church That Loves Holiness

The church belongs to Christ. He purchased His people with His own blood, and He calls His bride to holiness. That means we cannot treat sin casually.

We should never become spiritual policemen, eagerly searching for reasons to condemn one another. But neither should we become so afraid of offending people that we refuse to speak the truth. There is a biblical balance. We confront sin because we love people. We pursue holiness because Christ is worthy. We practice discipline because souls matter. And we extend grace because the gospel is powerful enough to save and restore sinners.

The answer to sin is never self-righteousness. It is Christ. When we sin, we run to Him. When a brother or sister confronts us lovingly, we shouldn't become defensive. We should examine our hearts and ask, Is there something here that I need to repent of? And when we must confront someone else, we should do so with humility, truth, gentleness, and genuine concern for their soul.

The church should be a place where repentance is normal, where confession is welcomed, where holiness is pursued, and where sinners are pointed continually back to their Savior. Because the gospel doesn't tell us that our sin doesn't matter. The gospel tells us that Jesus Christ is a great enough Savior to forgive it.

So let us not be like the Corinthians, tolerating what God calls sin. Let us instead be a people who love one another enough to speak the truth, humble enough to receive correction, and quick to run back to Christ when we fall.

After all, church discipline is ultimately not about punishment. It is about love. Sometimes the most loving thing we can say to someone is: "I love you too much to pretend that everything is okay. Please—come back to Christ."